Grill Wilson

Hard Times for Jeff Spicoli: Part One

“Well Stu, I’ve gotta tell you, I had a lotta rough breaks out there, but I have a feeling in the end things are gonna go my way, huhuhuh yeaah.”

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Fast and Furious Part Four: The Ballad of Laz Alonso

Well here we are again, exploring the vast universe that is Fast and Furious, a movie so big it could only be contained in four posts. Full disclosure, I could have wrapped this movie up in three posts, but this post pretty much needed to live on its own, so you can feel the full effect of what Laz Alonso has done. The guy is a pretty straight laced actor in other roles (see Breakout Kings), but he really found the freedom to go full grill in the role of Fenix. Fenix is a cartoon character of the highest order. Some other guys show up in this post in clearly defined supporting roles, but this puppy belongs to Laz Alonso. I’m just gonna go ahead and bestow MVG (Most Valuable Grills) on my man Laz Alonso, this is his ballad. Enjoy it, I know you will.

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Ladies and Gentleman, I give you the Golden Grillz 2012.

I do realize that the 2012 Golden Globes took place months ago. I also realize that Gawker beat me to the punch. But what they don’t realize, is that when you spend an hour making your post, you can’t mine for gold as effectively. I’ve spent the better part of two months hand crafting this post for maximal comedic output. I’ve never poured more effort into my  animated gifs. These are the biggest stars in the world, and dammit, they deserve the red carpet grill treatment. So basically Gawker, stay your lane, get out of mine and leave the grill game to the professionals. You’ve been warned. For the Grillwilson.com faithful (the several of you), I proudly bestow upon you my magnum opus. I may have to lay off the animated gifs after this one, for in them resides the entirety of my soul, enjoy it.

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American Face-Off, Round: 1

Patrick Bateman (Christian Bale) is a rich, nice, and all round good guy living in New York City who, because of his grill prowess, can’t help but strut around with supreme confidence. Here he is out the gates hitting us with a basic yet well cooked grill. Note how the perfectly aligned eyebrows go hauntingly well with the angled stripes of his shirt. The man can accessorize with his face! Brilliant!

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Happy Malentine’s Day 2012!

The year: 1991.
The setting: Sunny California.
Weather conditions: Perfect.
Bromance Factor™: Sweltering.

In case you haven’t figured it out already, this year’s Malentine’s Day treat is brought to you by our friend Point Break. According to Wikipedia, the film was originally set to star Matthew Broderick and Charlie Sheen, with Ridley Scott directing. Lucky for us, that abomination never saw the light of day.

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Fast and Furious: 2bros 2gether, again.

Y’all thought I forgot about my old faithful, the Fast Franchi$e, but I assure that I have not. This grill casserole has been in the over for quite some time, its not loaded with peas and rice and shit, just pure unfiltered grill magic. Homeboy Campos (John Ortiz) is ready to get this show on the road. I myself am pretty much ready to get this show on the road. Let’s do this.

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